My subconscious is weird

I had a dream the other night that I was being actively romantically pursued by Seth Rogen.

First of all -- Seth Rogen? I mean, he seems nice, but....really?

Second of all -- even in my dream, I was schlumpy -- hair in a ponytail, oversized sweatshirt. Really, why would he come all the way to London, Ontario to get some of that?

Thirdly -- when he picked me up for our date (at my neighbours' house, two doors down, for some reason), he said, "I was thinking we could just make some dinner, I see here that hamburgers are on sale." And he was holding a No Frills flyer!

Apparently I prize frugality and low expectations.

Biology question

Why does a sphincter have such a messed up sense of geography?

Or a sense of geography at all, for that matter?

Because inevitably, when you're two or three blocks away from home, your sphincter says, "Oh good, we're home" and starts to relax, even though every other fibre of your being is screaming: "NOT YET NOT YET NOT YET NOT YET!"

Someone needs to invent a sphincter GPS. In this case, though, it would be a "geographical poo synchronizer."